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I'm in Texas, visiting my parents, and resting and healing from acute bronchitis that I acquired over Yule and Christmas. I am having a good visit, and I have bought many good books on Zen, the arts, and mysticism from my mother. I am eating less, but better---although I have had an excellent chicken-fried steak and I have plans for Texas BBQ tomorrow at Rudy's. It is difficult to be away from the Fortress of Solitude for a week, but Phaedrus is being well taken care of by the BF and Tamarta.
I am performing kata, although slowly, and I am forced to breathe easier. Speaking of breathing, I have committed to a White Tantric teacher with the appropriate approvals, and I am learning to breathe, and to think about myself differently, yet again. This is good. Some of my current homework will have to wait until I feel a bit better, however.
I had a wonderful New Year's weekend with Tamarta, a magickal experience, using some of my newly learned tantric knowledge. It allowed me to focus better and to hold stances and to move chi below surface levels, although I was substantially drained of energy afterward. My illness and the New Year's party, as well as the airline experience, have forced me to rest, not something I am usually comfortable doing. I have been sleeping for more than 10 hours a night, and doing very little other than kata physically.
This was a year of Chaos, and painful learning, as we all fought Ourselves and became embroiled in Drama. Let us call off our Warriors. Let this year be a change, as we learn to communicate better, and work on discipline of Self and integrating and learning from our fears. Let us draw strength from stillness. Let us learn to act without acting. Let us work on those tiny but frightening tasks, and stop what you are doing right now, and to stop what you are becoming while you do it, and answer those questions that have no right to go away.
I am performing kata, although slowly, and I am forced to breathe easier. Speaking of breathing, I have committed to a White Tantric teacher with the appropriate approvals, and I am learning to breathe, and to think about myself differently, yet again. This is good. Some of my current homework will have to wait until I feel a bit better, however.
I had a wonderful New Year's weekend with Tamarta, a magickal experience, using some of my newly learned tantric knowledge. It allowed me to focus better and to hold stances and to move chi below surface levels, although I was substantially drained of energy afterward. My illness and the New Year's party, as well as the airline experience, have forced me to rest, not something I am usually comfortable doing. I have been sleeping for more than 10 hours a night, and doing very little other than kata physically.
This was a year of Chaos, and painful learning, as we all fought Ourselves and became embroiled in Drama. Let us call off our Warriors. Let this year be a change, as we learn to communicate better, and work on discipline of Self and integrating and learning from our fears. Let us draw strength from stillness. Let us learn to act without acting. Let us work on those tiny but frightening tasks, and stop what you are doing right now, and to stop what you are becoming while you do it, and answer those questions that have no right to go away.
