A question.

[grim23]

So, while drinking Turkish coffee with my BF while in Raleigh before we went to a biker rally, she said that I am often unaware that I sometimes make requests of people in a way that makes it difficult for them to say no or ask for what they need, and set their own boundaries with me. She said this may come across as manipulation or taking advantage of people. At the same time, she also said that once I am aware of a boundary, I am very good at honoring it.

She also said my greatest quality was challenging others to grow and develop.


I welcome all comments, anonymous or not, regarding her insights into me. Anything. I do not question her perception of me. What I'm looking for is other feedback about how I do these things. I am in NC for a year, and I have a chance to grow while I am away from who I was when I was in OR. I'm working on improving my self, especially my communication with others.

Thank you.

Comments

[grim23]

Your noticing that I do not hear what I don't want to hear and that many people in this world have this issue, is, I believe, very true. However, I'm striving to improve myself and communicate more clearly than that ... and so, I want to understand you. I think that is also a very valid point that I as a white male, have privilege and it is indeed not something I often think about.

Would you be OK with please giving me examples, especially when I didn't hear what I didn't want to hear? If you don't feel comfortable with re-posting on lj, would you be OK with calling me or emailing me? If you'd like, I can call or email you if you've a preference. Thank you.